Here is the first thing that popped into my head when I first glimpsed a copy of this book: I need to give this to my husband! Because his reaction to feedback is usually defensive.
And that's what we always think, right? That someone else's response to feedback is poor, but that we welcome it as a growing experience, that we somehow have mastered the ability to accept feedback gracefully.
But let's be realistic: this isn't usually the case. Even if we sit calmly as our boss, client, coworkers, or spouse, opine about our work and/or contributions, we often do it with gritted teeth, and then spend the next few hours mulling over all the injustices.
Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well
offers insight into why feedback is so hard to take. It is because "feedback sits at the junction of two conflicting human desires: we want to learn and grow but we also want to be accepted and respected just as we are now."
But feedback is always going to be a part of our lives. "We swim in an ocean of feedback," the authors say. So it's about time we learned not to resist, and even not to accept, feedback, to embrace it and say "thank you."
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a copy of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (even when it is off base, unfair, poorly delivered, and, frankly, you're not in the mood)
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